


Liquor Lisp

by roses_bees_deer



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Drunk Sex, Lisp!Lock, Lisping Sherlock, M/M, Sherlock has a lisp, Unilock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-07
Updated: 2014-12-07
Packaged: 2018-02-28 11:47:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2731307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roses_bees_deer/pseuds/roses_bees_deer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John just wanted a beer, but what he got was much better.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Liquor Lisp

**Author's Note:**

> This is in no way meant to make fun of lisps or any type of speech impediment.

John was absolutely rubbish at anatomy which was a problem since you kind of need that to be a doctor. He _knew_ what everything was, but it was pointing it out or remembering the real names of things that he struggled with. He had struggled all the way through secondary school with memorization and now he was in university with his first exam and he could not for the life of him label body systems accurately.

He took a frustrated breath and stared intensely at a labelled drawing of the skeletal system for a few moments before flipping the paper over and staring at a blank copy. This should have been so fucking simple. He learned it all in _primary_ school. It was like the bloody solar system. He sighed and threw his hands up in the air and pushed himself away from his desk.

“If you insist on being in here while I’m experimenting, could you at least make an _attempt_ at being quiet?” Sherlock sighed in such a _long suffering_ way that made John want to suffocate him while he slept.

“If _you_ insist on doing experiments in our room, you can get over it,” John snapped, getting up to stretch. He could do this. He just needed to clear your head.

“You shouldn’t procrastinate. Your exam is in less the eighteen hours, is it not?” Sherlock said, getting up and removing his goggles.

The first time that Sherlock had done an experiment in their room, John had not been happy, but he preferred the experiments over the _people_ that he would have over. It was their first year in uni and had never shared a space like this before. They both had to make allowances. John had to warn Sherlock before he brought anyone home and Sherlock had to…

Well, Sherlock probably ought to have made changes, but John never really saw any difference with his habits.

“I need a drink,” John sighed exasperatedly. He went to open his mini fridge but Sherlock stopped him.

“You probably shouldn’t…” Sherlock started slowly but John gave him a look that made him finish quickly. “Let me get it.” Sherlock blocked John’s view into the fridge as he took out two beers, kicking it shut.

“I’ve heard that it is sad to drink alone,” Sherlock offered to John’s surprised look at the two bottles.

John smiled a little and sat down on his bed after accepting the beer from Sherlock. He uncaps it with his room key and leans back against the wall. Sherlock was still standing in the room holding his beer awkwardly so John took pity on him and patted the mattress next to him.

“We really should get to know each other better, Sherlock. We’ve still got a long time of living with each other left.”

“I already know everything important about you. No worries,” Sherlock said. John sighed softly and took Sherlock’s beer from him to open it.

“Thank you?” Sherlock said. He looked at the beverage with a slightly puzzled expression while John watched him. John smiled a little and took a drink that Sherlock mirrored.

It certainly was not tea, but Sherlock could manage. Inebriation must make it taste better.

And that was how it happened. That was how Sherlock Holmes ended up getting completely pissed with John Watson and how John Watson found out Sherlock’s Holmes’s biggest secret.

“John, if you you want to know thomething about me that’th important, I’ve got thomething.”

“Oh yeah? What’s that?” John laughed, watching Sherlock on his fourth beer.

“I used to have a lithp. I had to go to thpeach therapy for yearth before It wath corrected. Now it only happeneth if I’m not paying enough attention.”

John dissolved into a fit of giggles, burying his face into Sherlock’s arm to try to stifle them.

“It’th not funny, John!” Sherlock slurred and lisped, grabbing onto John and pulling him close so they were face to face.

“I had a lipth.”

“I know!” John cried out through his unending laughter.

“I don’t thee what’th tho funny,” Sherlock pouted.

“You’re not paying attention right now!”

Sherlock thought for moment. “Am I talking with a lithp?”  

“You are!” John finally said flopping down onto the bed and letting another empty bottle roll away on the floor.

“Hm,” Sherlock frowned, lying down next to John.

“Am I thtill talking like that?”

John hummed affirmatively and patted Sherlock’s head.

“You have soft hair?”

“Thoft?” Sherlock asked.

John nodded and touched Sherlock’s nose.

“I think your lisp is cute.”

“I _know_ that, John. I already deduthed!” Sherlock slurred, crinkling his face up at John’s touch.

“What else have you deduced?” John asked, nuzzling his face into Sherlock’s curls.

“That you like my hair!” Sherlock giggled and squirmed.

“Mm, that is very true,” John nodded. “What else?”

Sherlock hummed in thought for a long moment that left John giggling even more.

“I have deduthed!” Sherlock finalled announced,” That John Wathon loveth me!”

“I do?” John raised his eyebrows.

“You do. I deduthed it.” Sherlock nodded solemnly.

“Then it must be true then. You _are_ the genius.”

“I am,” Sherlock nodded.

“Then, do you love me too?” John countered, leaning up on one arm so he was looking down at Sherlock.

“Of courthe I do, John. Don’t be thlow.”

John smiled broadly before leaning down and pressing a kiss to Sherlock’s alcohol flavoured lips.

Sherlock made a surprised noise against John’s lips and his arms flailed around a bit before settling on John’s waist. John took that as a hint to do more. John moved one leg over Sherlock’s hips and kissed him harder, one hand going into Sherlock’s hair and tugging gently.

Sherlock’s reaction made John pull back. He had jerked so hard and made such a noise John thought he must have hurt him.

“Do that again!” Sherlock demanded, breathing heavily and digging his fingers into John’s hips. “Pleathe!”

 John would never be able to deny Sherlock like this. He leant down and resumed their snog with a hand always messing with Sherlock’s hair.

He thought he was going to explode. It was barely minutes before Sherlock was writhing beneath John and his kisses and whimpering against his lips.

John’s lips moved to Sherlock’s neck and Sherlock’s mouth was free to speak again.

“Pleathe, John, that feelth tho good… Why didn’t you tell me thith before? God, you’re brilliant. No, better wordeth. Thexthy? Thmart? Thuper?”

“Stop talking,” John suggested, whispering in Sherlock’s ear before continuing to suck a love bite onto Sherlock’s neck.

“Thee? You’re thmart. OH! John! Do that again!”

John had rubbed their hips together and moaned softly. John continued to grind their still clothed lengths together.

“Yeth, yeth, yeth, yeth, John, PLEATHE!” Sherlock moaned and yelled as he reached his orgasm in about fifteen seconds.

Even drunk stupid, John knew that it had been a bit fast. He was about to point that out to Sherlock when he noticed the tosser was already asleep.

John sighed softly and decided he might as well finish Sherlock’s beer before he went to sleep too.

He failed the exam. 


End file.
